memphisLimelight

In a city of half a million people, there's not always something to do on a Friday night.  But there's always something to do in the summer time.  It's like mating season for social butterflies. 

With the sweltering sun turning up the heat on seduction, it's a simple truth in the South that people get horny when it's hot.  Like my best gay boyfriend Standish says "If you're gonna sweat, you might as well make it sexy." But of course, all that exposed, glistening skin may have something to do with it. 

The skirts get shorter, revealing lengthier views of bare legs.  And with halters and tube tops showing off shoulders, we're all walking around practically naked.  But sometimes in the midst of the party, sex be damned.  You may want to get it on with that ripped mimbo whose biceps are bigger than his brain, but you're having too much fun to leave Earnestine & Hazel's.

Gloria, who's not a bitch, she's just married to Robert, certainly knew how to have a good time.  She was a downtown hostess-with-the-mostess who threw impromptu dinner parties for the imbibing set.  Devoted to her husband, Gloria claimed she didn't know what I was talking about, and Ruby wasn't much help either.  (But they didn't prove me wrong.)

When did sex become less fun than fun?  Is it not worth the risk of catching an STD to take off your LBD?  With all this non-coital commitment to the groove, I couldn't help but wonder:  Are we sacrificing our sexual selves for our social selves?

• Italian Fest started yesterday and goes through Sat at Marquette Park.  (Downtowners, take your passport and a cab.)
• Tonight is the South Main Trolley Tour and a Sex and the City party at Itta Benna.  The movie is out, and though it will probably be disappointing I am going to see it.
• Sun 1pm - Funky Vintage Car Show next to Memphis Mary's

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A local downtown patio was recently turtled and then pickled.  The other morning, a couple of South Main residents (who prefer to remain anonymous) found a live turtle in the cracked-pot-turned-ashtray on their patio.  (Poor turtle in there with all those cigarette butts.)  "There's no way it got in there by itself," one of the homeowners say.  "I set him free in the courtyard."

In a strange turn of events, the same residents found pickle spears scattered all over their patio two nights later.  "None of our crackpot friends are owning up to it," they say.  "And we don't have any enemies, at least not that have access to our patio." 

Experts say the targeted couple may be suffering from PTT&PS, and the victims are looking for answers.

Any information leading to an explanation of this turtling and pickling will be rewarded with a free subscription to this blog.

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First let me just say, Ow, my head.  Sometimes the weekend seems to start early.  Last night was one of those times for me and my crew.  So I thought I'd give some hangover tips.  Usually, my remedy is something like this:  coffee, 3-4 glasses of orange juice, eggs, coke, and then a bloody mary later.  I have heard that bananas have so much potassium that they can make you feel better and that the vitamin C in o.j. is helpful as well.  The coke is something I crave, maybe for the sugar or the caffeine.

Robert Benchley said, "There is no cure for the hangover, save death."  But David Wondrich's Esquire Drinks: An Opinionated & Irreverent Guide to Drinking lists Coca-Cola as a dependable and potent tonic for the overhang.

They also list the bloody mary (recipe below), and in my opinion, when you crave the bloody or a beer, you know you're going to be okay and back at it again.

Dr. Mehmet Oz, who is all renowned and shit for doctorly stuff, thanks to Oprah (try not to hold that against him), offered the following on her website:

"You never really want to have alcohol without water next to it. You need the water to flush it through your system. That's pretty simple," he says. "But the alcohol you drink should be the color of water, ideally, as well." Dr. Oz says this is because darker alcohols contain more congeners, which he says are what causes hangovers.

If you wake up with a hangover, Dr. Oz says to eat something—especially eggs. "Eggs are effective because the eggs, in their yolk, have something called N-acetyl-cysteine," he says. "What it really is, is a way of giving your body antioxidants, and those antioxidants are critically important to your liver that's going to battle right now trying to cleanse all the junk that's left over."

Dr. Oz says taking aspirin can help reduce the inflammation caused by drinking. A cup of Joe doesn't hurt either. "Coffee's pretty effective, because alcohol is a depressant. Alcohol takes you down," he says. Unfortunately, when you sleep after drinking alcohol, Dr. Oz says it's not "good sleep." "[Alcohol] just sort of gets you into a sleepy period, and you're depressed all night long. Coffee's a stimulant, so it gets you going again in the morning."

This is one of my favorite ways to enjoy a Bloody Mary:

Tomatini

2 1/2-oz quality vodka

5-oz tomato juice

1/2-oz lemon juice

1/8 tsp black pepper

1/8 tsp celery seed

1/8 tsp salt

3 dashes Worcestershire

3 dashes Louisiana Hot Sauce

Lawry's Seasoned Salt

1 lemon wedge

Chill a martini glass.  In a shaker half-filled with ice cubes, combine the first eight ingredients.  Wet the rim of the chilled glass with lemon juice and dust with the seasoned salt.  (If hung over, add crushed aspirin to the salt.)  Shake well and strain into the martini glass.  Garnish with lemon wedge and one or two green olives.
 

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Word has it that the Blue Monkey is opening today.  I heard this last week and was reluctant to post it, due to the lack of any official announcement and the fact that I don't think they're ever going to open again.  However, as for rumors, the only one I know of was here on April 1st.  And it was a joke, people!  You know, April Fools.  And their neon signs are on today. 

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Paul taking a picture of the Hooters girls.

GloBo on the Ques Brothers deck

These guys don't seem to cook or clean up after themselves,

but they're very enthusiastic about singing Rockytop every couple of hours.

Mikey

Terrence

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Go Ruby!!! And Ryan (for being a ham on the news).

http://media.myfoxmemphis.com/sponsors/bbq08/index.html

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My friend Bonez With a Z pointed out this morning (actually noon) that we probably committed at least 6 of the 7 deadly sins yesterday.  Well, let's see.  The 7 deadly sins are: lust, gluttony, greed, sloth, wrath, envy, and pride.

Lust - No.  Oh wait, yes I did.  There's a lot of this at the festival with its Mardi Gras-like atmosphere.

Gluttony - Absolutely.

Greed - Um, I'm not one to share my beer, but this one doesn't really apply.

Sloth - Yes.

Wrath - No, but with the lusty vibe going on, a lot of women are on edge.  Cattiness is a slippery slope to wrath.  And if I get one more unwarranted dirty look, I may have to open a can of whoopass.

Envy - No.

Pride - Always.

Other thoughts on BBQ Fest

Yesterday was so cold.  I'm so glad I live downtown and was able to just walk up to my apartment and change clothes.  I've been checking weather.com, and they did not prepare me for how cold it turned out to be.

The mud came out of my favorite jeans with a little spray and wash!!  It has ruined clothes before. 

Turducken: Why?  I don't get it and don't really want an explanation.

Here are some pics from the Hogfather tent:

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Here's something to get you in the mood ... for BBQ Fest

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EiDOsYAZu4Q

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Here's a little video I made from the 1st MIM weekend:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=94X5L_1xPcI

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Vote for Calhoun's as Favorite Sports Bar among other sports categories.

www.memphissport.net

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This upcoming event will be on Sun, June 1st at Madison and Danny Thomas (across from the Wonder Bread Factory).

Hosted by American Dream Safari, vintage cars, trailers, and motorcycles are welcome, and it starts at 1pm.

Posted by admin at 01:37 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

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I went to Clarksdale, MS, for a night with some friends last week.  We stayed at the funky little Shack Up Inn.  I'd been once before and would not pass up the opportunity if I can help it. 

If you haven't heard about it, it's a really unique place to stay right outside the tiny town through which the crossroads run.  That's the point at which blues legend Robert Johnson sold his soul to the devil so he could play the guitar, probabaly what Ground Zero Blues Club is named for, which is also in Clarksdale.

The following video will give you an idea of what a night at the Shack Up is like. (Keep in mind that none of my group knew any of these people until that night.)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fEC3dE5aqNk

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The following took place at a trolley stop.

Bum: Hey ma'am, are you from here?

Me: Yes.

Where are you going?

Don't worry about it.

What's your name?

[Irritated look.]

Just tell me.

Harmony.

That's pretty.  My name's Curtis.

Hi Curtis. Where is this f-ing trolley?

You've got beautiful hair.  How much do you spend on it?

What?

About $100?

Yep.

I can tell.  What's your sign?  C'mon, tell me.

Libra.

I'm a scorpio.

Well, that's good.

I knew you were a libra.  My momma's a libra.

Mmhmm.

She is.  It's in October.  How would I know that?

You probably know all of them.  [Looking for trolley.]

You know what?  I can tell you something else.  You feel unappreciated.  Don't you?  It's in your eyes.

That's a good one.  Most people don't feel appreciated enough.

I think you're lying to me.  You might even be lying about being a libra.

I might be.

A lot of people think I'm panhandling.  Am I panhandling?

Not yet, but why don't you go ahead and leave before you offend me.

Can I see you again?

No!

I'm not trying to see you, but if you see me again, will you say hi?

It depends.  I doubt it.

Tell your boyfriend he needs to step up and appreciate you more.

My boyfriend is just fine.

Then why are you here with me?

I'm not.  You're here with me after I already asked you to leave.

[Finally walks off, mumbling under his breath.]

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I've had several people high-five me recently, and I thought Are we doing this again already?  I'm still comfortable fist-bumping with all its honkey variations: blowing it up, throwing away the key, etc.

A white friend told me recently when she went to high-five a black guy (at Music Fest), there was an awkward moment of raised palm and fist, with both left hanging.  He said, "We'll do it your way, and then we'll do it my way."  I didn't think this was a race thing anymore since everyone I knew was fist-bumping for a while.  What happened?

When these awkward moments happen, both people usually try to correct, resulting in the street-cred-turned-dorky equivalent of two people trying to step out of each other's way on the street.  "Wanna dance?" [Nervous laugh.]  And that, my friends, is not cool, which totally negates the purpose of the gesture.  Are we going to have to start five-bumping? 

Maybe I'm behind.  I doubt it since I singlehandedly brought Booyah back, but please let me know if I am.  Until I hear different, I for one, am still fist-bumping.  Please adjust your digits accordingly.

Posted by admin at 12:21 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

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A new bar, called the Memphis Mary Lounge, is open at 345 Madison.  Memphis Mary is a bloody mary mix created by local entrepreneur Tad Pierson, and its name is based on the mysterious healing broth given to the sick during the Yellow Fever Epidemic by prostitute-turned-nurse "Mary."  The lounge is in a soft opening stage with a full bar and snacks, such as "hot legs." 

Any servers looking for work, check it out, especially if you are the roller-derby-girl type! 

The bar is a very short trolley ride from downtown and has a great atmosphere and a big screen with movies and random viewing du jour to come. 

Right now, Memphis Mary Lounge is open M - F, "5 til L'eight."  Grand opening coming soon. 

Tonight:  Rock Obama Rally 5p til.

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